My Paranoid Thoughts About Special Agent Steven Horan

On the evening of August 6, 1998 two Special Agents of the US Capitol Police (Threat Investigation Unit) forcibly entered my home, after frisking me for weapons, and proceeded to interrogate me about an allegation made by a DC employee that, earlier in the day, at the height of an enraged argument, I had threatened to kill two federal officers at point-blank range, execution style in the Capitol rotunda. Later investigation by Agent Steven Horan disclosed that said allegation was mistakenly based on a letter I had written to my psychiatrist (Stephen Quint, MD) and copied to a DC agency that factually summarized Mr. Race's violence-risk determination; my supervisor's homicide-risk determination; as well as the DC Corporation Counsel's determination that my coworkers had formed a reasonable apprehension that I might commit an armed, mass homicide. Though I was exonerated of making unlawful threats, Officer Horan photo ID'd me to all federal officers assigned to the U.S. Capitol Building as a protective measure.

On August 7, 1998 Agent Horan advised me that the federal government (unbeknownst to me) had previously placed my name on a national registry of potential terrorists because of a letter I had written in 1996 to a local psychiatric facility (The Meyer Clinic), inquiring into out-patient services. Said letter elaborated Mr. Race's violence-risk determination as well as my supervisor's homicide-risk determination.

On the afternoon of August 7, 1998 two Special Agents of the U.S. Secret Service placed me under house arrest because of concerns I might pose a risk of harm to President Clinton. The two Secret Service agents were part of a team of six federal special agents who had been assigned to interrogate me and secure my person, over a two-day period (August 6-7, 1998). Federal law enforcement concerns were aroused by a letter I had written and sent to a DC agency that discussed the federal civil rights implications of the DC Corporation Counsel's handling of 96-CV-961. I had sent an identical letter to U.S. Senator Arlen Specter (R.-PA.) on Capitol Hill, who responded with a cordial and personalized reply. Senator Specter, a former prosecutor, saw absolutely nothing threatening about the letter I had written, much less did he see the need to assign six federal special agents to interrogate me and secure my person.

So it was a really wild scene in my apartment on the evening of August 6, 1998 with two federal officers interrogating me about an allegation that I had threatened to commit a violent crime. Agent Horan said that agents of the U.S. Secret Service were on their way to my apartment and that they had further information.

Finally, the two Secret Service agents arrived, including an Asian agent named Marzano Lee. Agent Lee walked over to me politely and introduced himself. At that moment I noticed the expression on Agent Horan's face. The expression wasn't one of relief, as I would have expected. Agent Horan had a momentary look of sharp disappointment and anger. The friendly attitude of Secret Service Agent Lee communicated the fact that the Secret Service did not see me as a threat. Agent Lee seemed to have the full story that I had not threatened anyone at the height of an enraged argument, which was the information that Agent Horan had. Instead, the Secret Service was concerned about the text of a letter I had written that was addressed to Janet Reno; that letter was part of a document transmission I had sent to the DC Office of City Administrator that illustrated the federal civil rights implications of findings by the DC government affirming the position of my former employer, Akin Gump, that I was paranoid and potentially violent.

So I thought Agent Horan's reaction seemed a little peculiar. Why wasn't he relieved that I didn't pose an imminent threat of harm? Why was he angry? I suspect he felt as if he had made a fool out of himself and that he felt ashamed. Psychoanalysts say that conscious anger can mask unconscious feelings of shame.

Also, I had a tentative theory. Is it possible that Agent Horan had fantasies of making "the Big Arrest?" -- that he would get accolades at Headquarters for stopping a second Capitol Hill shooter in his tracks? Is it possible that Agent Horan's actions on the evening of August 6, 1998 were motivated by his desire for fame and notoriety, symptomatic of a narcissistic trend in his personality?

The following day, Friday August 7, 1998, I met with my new psychiatrist Albert H. Taub, MD, at the P Street Clinic. After my meeting with Dr. Taub I travelled to Capitol Hill to meet with Agent Horan at U.S. Capital Police Headquarters. The previous evening, Agent Horan directed me to meet with him the next day. My meeting with Agent Horan was uneventful.

After my business with Agent Horan was concluded, two U.S. Secret Service Agents arrived at the U.S. Capital Police Headquarters. I had never seen these agents before. Secret Service Agent Lee, who visited my apartment the previous evening, was not one of the agents. I noticed that when Agent Horan saw the two Secret Service agents, Agent Horan gave them a kind of knowing smile, as if they had all concocted a plan and that I was the guinea pig. At least that was my paranoid thought at that moment.

The two Secret Service agents were noticably young and good-looking. I think one of the agents was named "Brett."

Agent Horan said the Secret Service Agents would drive me home. I said I could go home myself, but Agent Horan insisted that the agents were there to accompany me home.

The funny business started as soon as the Secret Service Agents accompanied me to their vehicle. I noticed sexual double-entendres. I had no idea what was going on, but I felt the words and phrases they used were intentionally sexually-suggestive.

When we got into the vehicle, one agent sat in the back of the car with me, while another agent drove. The sexual innuendo continued throughout the drive home. The agent seated next to me asked me where I usually went in the afternoons. I said I usually visited the library. They said they could take me there. They said that if I went to the library they would wait outside in their vehicle. I asked: "What if I want to go somewhere else?" They politely said they would follow me wherever I went.

When we arrived at my apartment I got out of the vehicle, and the Secret Service agent advised me that they would sit in the vehicle outside my apartment. They told me I was free to go anywhere, but that they would follow me wherever I went.

One of the agents asked me if it was OK if the agents entered my apartment and had a look around. I said: "I would prefer that you not do that." They said that was fine.

So I entered my apartment and stayed there for the rest of the afternoon, knowing that two Secret Service agents were parked just outside my apartment. Late in the afternoon I received a telephone call from the Secret Service Washington Field Office. The agent told me over the phone that the Secret Service had resolved its concerns about me and that I was free to go about my business without being followed. The agent also advised me that S.A. Maruzano Lee would be assigned to my case.

What did I make of the seeming sexual innuendo? I think that Agent Horan had done some investigating and had learned, based on my court appeal, that I was "homosexual." I believe Agent Horan and the two Secret Service Agents had concocted a scheme in which I would make sexual overtures to the Secret Service agents assigned to escort me home. Perhaps, my behavior could lead to my arrest.

My psychoanalytic thinking runs along the following lines. Agent Horan's behavior in my apartment the previous evening, the fact that he was wrong about me, was a narcissistic injury for him. The experience was castrating for him. He sought to discharge the narcissistic injury by means of projective identification. He would prompt me to make a homosexual overture to the two Secret Service agents, which might lead to my arrest or embarrasment. Perhaps -- just perhaps -- Agent Horan's ego had also been deflated by his inability to make the "Big Arrest" the previous evening.

Tentative Personality Profile of U.S. Capital Police Special Agent Steven Horan:

1. Narcissitic trend and grandiosity as evidenced by his need to gain notoriety through the arrest of the "second Capitol Hill shooter."

2. Struggle with narcissistic injury and castration anxiety. Ego fragility centering on Agent Horan's professional competence. Agent Horan experienced his professional mistakes the previous evening in my apartment as a narcissistic injury. He felt like a "fag."

3. Use of projective identification to alter the environment by prompting me to make a homosexual overture on two Secret Service agents. Projective identification is a symptom of narcissistic disorder. Here Agent Horan tried to manufacture evidence that I was in fact a "fag" (projective identification)in order to abreact his narcissistic injury and castration anxiety.

4. Defect in impulse control. Note that Agent Horan had projected onto me poor impulse control: that I would be unable to control "my homosexual" impulses in the company of two good-looking, young Secret Service agents. Note that defective impulse control might also explain some of Agent Horan's behavior at my apartment the previous evening.

5. Undoing. Agent Horan thought he could "undo" his mistake the previous evening by getting me arrested the following day, so that I would face punishment in the end anyway.

My conclusion is that no psychiatrist can ever find me mentally competent. I am constantly forming theories about my environment. I don't create evidence that I am disturbed to preserve my disability benefits. I simply act like Freedman; Freedman acting like Freedman will always appear severely disturbed.