The Fourteen Points: The Israel/Lebanon War 2006

1. The ultimate aim of Hamas is the creation of a Palestinian state. FALSE. The ultimate aim of Hamas is the destruction of Israel.

2. The ultimate aim of Hezbollah is ensuring the sovereignty of Lebanon. FALSE. The ultimate aim of Hezbollah is the destruction of Israel.

3. Israel could enhance its security by pulling out of the West Bank. FALSE. Israel pulled out of Lebanon six years ago, and look what happened. Israel pulled out of Gaza last year and look what happened.

4. How many Jews have been killed since Israel pulled out of Gaza. ANSWER: Nobody really knows or cares.

5. How many Lebanese did Israel kill in the war? Of course, that figure is on the tips of everyone's tongues.

6. The first official act of Israeli Defense Minister Amir Peretz upon assuming office earlier this year was to call for an increase in Israel's military budget. FALSE. Peretz called for a 5% CUT in Israel's military spending upon assuming office.

7. Amir Peretz is a Jewish traitor. TRUE.

8. Ehud Olmert is a courageous leader. FALSE. And please, don't insult my intelligence with any more stupid comments.

9. What will Ehud Olmert do when Hezbollah obtains precision-guided missiles that can specifically target Haifa's petrochemical installations. Answer: G-d knows. Maybe he'll ask for the assistance of the UN to disarm Hezbollah. That always works. Hahahahaha

10. What will Ehud Olmert do when Hezbollah obtains chemical weapons? Answer: G-d knows.

11. Ehud Olmert enhanced Israel's security by agreeing to a cease-fire with Hezbollah. FALSE. The situation is very similar to the Armistice that ended World War I. In that case, Germany ultimately re-armed and re-occupied the Rhineland.

12. The ultimate aim of going to war is to agree to a cease-fire. TRUE -- in the bizarro world of Ehud Olmert and his ministers.

13. Olmert should do the honorable thing and resign. TRUE.

14. The United Nations is interested in securing peace in the Middle East and guaranteeing the security of Israel. FALSE. The UN is interested in engaging in cynical acts that guarantee the continued existence of the UN.