Friday, June 29, 2007

How I Burned My Foot

I enjoy having breakfast in bed. I like waking up to the smell of bacon. Sue me. And since I don't have a butler, I have to do it myself. So, most nights before I go to bed I will lay six strips of bacon out on my George Foreman grill. Then I go to sleep. When I wake up I plug in the grill. I go back to sleep again. Then I wake up to the smell of crackling bacon. It is delicious, it's good for me. It's the perfect way to start the day. Today I got up, I stepped onto the grill and it clamped down on my foot. That's it. I don't see what's so hard to believe about that.


Desambientado said...


It is a great pleasure to read you.


Anonymous said...

Gary - Question what in the Lord's Name in the Grill Machine doing on the FLOOR!! I really think a big case of O.C.D is alive here.
I used to enjoy your blog often and Yes I hide behing the Mask of Anon as you have been to my Blog Several times - Only to leave a Comment so I will come to Yours and read your Rabblings. Time to Shut up Shop I think!!!

kevin said...

Maybe Gary Freedman isn't the one who needs to shut up.

Gary Freedman said...

People who leave anonymous comments are bottom feeders. What's the matter? You don't have the balls to leave your name?

Shiv said...


tell me, does crackling human skin smell anything like bacon?

Anonymous said...

I thought this seemed familar, then I remembered I just watched this on an episode of "The Office". It was a funny bit regardless of where it originated.

Anonymous said...

Hi Gary,
That sounds very painful what happened to you. Im am quite confused as to why you are keeping a George Forman on the floor? What would George himself say about that! Oh dear, but at least a lesson learned there then. Kitchen appliances should be kept on a steady surface in a kitchen. At least it was not a blender. PS im not the other anon person but i do not have a blog and just sometimes like to drop in on you and see how your doing. Take care Gary

Gary Freedman said...

Why do people assume I keep my George Foreman grill on the floor? Isn't equally possible that I walk on my furniture or on my kitchen counter?

Anonymous said...

Maybe we assume cos you said you got up and stood on it. That would mean you sleep on the roof and stood down on the Kitchen Top?? Yes??

Or you where going high kicks??

Anonymous said...

I was sent the link of your plagiarized story. I looked at some of your other postings and you appear to be fairly well read. I would think that someone with such an appreciation of the great art would never stoop to this. I am disgusted by you and any others who are so low as to steal other artists works. You slam anonymous/non-bloggers yet you are nothing more than a thief. Shame on you. ABC will likely be even more disappointed than I, as they have millions riding on their shows.
Just in case you were that out of touch: "pla·gia·rize ( P ) Pronunciation Key (plj-rz)
v. pla·gia·rized, pla·gia·riz·ing, pla·gia·riz·es
v. tr.
To use and pass off (the ideas or writings of another) as one's own.
To appropriate for use as one's own passages or ideas from (another)."

Gina Marie said...

There is MUCH anger in these comments.

Gary - the image of you walking around on your furniture is funny indeed. (Although, I have no idea what "you" look like)

Don't let the man getcha down